When Jay and I lived in Pittsburgh, one of the first activities we did with our community mates were 10 minute stories. We laid on blankets at a beautiful park overlooking the city and shared our life stories with one another. This has been something we have carried into every community we have lived in since in some capacity.

Photo Credit: www.nannygoatsinpanties.com

When we moved to Liberty, our little community shared 10 minutes stories in the same way as in Pittsburgh. It looked a little different because everyone knew each other a little more than our community in Pittsburgh where we all just moved in together with no history. In Liberty, the stories took a deeper level. Each person shared with the community personal details such as things we struggle with and how we wrestle with our faith. It was a beautiful way to understand our community mates a little better.

Now that we are part of Spare Key, we wanted to incorporate this somehow. Some of us realized that we have spent over two years sharing life with one another but still lacked an adequate understanding of what each person's day-to-day lives looked like. So, we began "Day In The Life" stories. Over the past several months, each of us have taken turns sharing what a day in our life looks like.

Ryan's story included a panoramic picture of his workspace for the City of Springfield. Rob showed us around the Watershed Center and Jay showed us a video of him teaching at OTC. For my Day in the Life a few weeks ago, I let the teacher in me show. I made this timeline to show what my crazy days look like right now.

So, why do we do this? In John Gottman's book, 7 Principles of Making Marriage Work, he talks about the importance of enhancing your love map of your mate. This principle (and many of the other 6 principles in the book!) applies extremely well to community and relationships in general. Learning what the day-to-day looks like for our community mates helps us understand them better. It enhances or love maps.

I have very much enjoyed hearing everyone's Day in the Life stories. I'm grateful to get to spend my days with such cool people. What else can we do to enhance our love maps?

My mom used to call me her "domestic diva." I guess that was a fitting nickname. I love taking an ordinary space and filling it with beautiful decor to make it feel like home. I enjoy inviting people to my house and serving them fun desserts. I adore receiving kitchen gadgets as gifts, but mostly I just like to create pretty things.

My finished project

I have been celebrating a lot lately. I have recently finished my Masters thesis; I am drawing near to the end of my graduate work; My birthday is coming up. We all like to celebrate important milestones. But this has got me thinking about the practice of celebration in general.

Celebration is the memorialization of happiness. It is the process of slowing down and experiencing happiness as it happens.

I am writing this post a good week after we completed what I have been referring to as The Incredible Journey. I needed this separation in order to process and in order to think upon this experience with some degree of fondness. Let me explain...

Two friends of our community from Kansas City - Josh and Alyssa Smith - invited us to join them on a walk across the state of Missouri during our Spring break. The plan was to walk for three days on the Katy Trail from Jefferson City to Herman - a grand total of 45 miles. Sounds easy enough, right? Just walk. With a 50 pound pack. Every day. For weeks. Across the entire state of Missouri. Yeah, it sounds like I am exaggerating, but when you are walking that far, you start to get delusional and believe that you are some Lewis and Clark explorer doing the most difficult thing in the world.

The first day, we met up with Josh and Alyssa at the Amtrak station in Jeff City. A very kind connection we had shuttled us to the trailhead in Jeff City and we were off! We were all in good spirits and happy to be on this adventure together. We each had differing strides and paces, so we spaced ourselves out with our walking buddy. We stopped at all 12 mile markers that day - as if we had accomplished some phenomenal feat with every completed stretch. We were all doing pretty great and enjoying the chill in the air and the conversation. Until about mile 8 or 9. Then we were ready to be done, at least for the first day.

We made it to the hostel in Tebbetts, MO around 6pm that night after six hours of walking, stopping, stretching, and talking. We read the directions on the door of the hostel that led us to where the key was "hiding" and let ourselves in. It was a two story building with bunk beds lining the walls and a small kitchen area. There were also showers and bathrooms. Many of the travelers were eager to warm up in a shower. We all had to pee. And most of us needed to refill our water bottles. Oh, and we planned to eat ramen and oatmeal with the heated water from the hotplate.

But, the water wasn't turned on in the building. Ooops. After some searching, we found a phone number and were directed to how to turn on the water outside with some sort of magic, a T-shaped tool, and brute force. A couple guys went out to turn it on. We'd be set up for a lovely, relaxing evening with just a the flip of the water switch. Until we realized as soon as they turned the water on, water began shooting out of broken pipes in multiple places in the bathroom. Ooops again. They quickly shut it off, but not before a good inch or two of water had pooled on the floor of the bathrooms.

We built a dam between the bathrooms and our sleeping space and went to work mopping. What could we do? We had no water. We were cold. We couldn't eat ramen and oatmeal. So, we laughed. This is going to be an interesting journey. A couple guys found water from an outdoor spigot at the church next door and hauled it to the hostel, filling up water bottles and setting some on to boil. The problems of day one finished, we bundled up in our sleeping bags and layers and went to sleep in the chilly hostel.

The next morning, we woke early, ate some oatmeal (or Fruit Loops if you are Travis) and set out on the trail. It was fun to watch the sunrise as we were walking and see it burn off the fog of the night. We read an essay out loud from the Best American Essays of 2011 and stuck pretty closely together for most of the morning. We were walking 6 miles to Mokane where we would stop for coffee and second breakfast. My feet began to develop some pretty crazy nerve pain that shot up through my back with every step and Alyssa's knee kept giving her trouble, so we called a friend of Ryan's who picked us two and Jay up in Mokane. He took us to our destination for that day - the Rendleman B&B in Bluffton, MO. We rested up that day while the other three completed the 20 mile journey for that day. They arrived around 6pm, exhausted, sore, and hungry. Doug, the owner of the B&B made a tasty dinner for us and we enjoyed his company around a table in a warm house with warm food and warm feelings. After a bonfire, we headed to bed to sleep off the soreness.

The next day was a 12 mile trek to Herman. We were all hurting, but we were all very determined. We made it to McKittrick around 2pm and began what felt like a hundred mile journey from the trail into Herman along the highway. It was only 2 miles, but when you can see your destination in the distance and you know all you have to do is walk to it, it feels like it takes f-o-r-e-v-e-r to get there. We entered Herman in high spirits, knowing we had accomplished a pretty amazing physical and mental adventure. We hobbled our way to a restaurant where we had the most delicious fried food of our lives and a few drinks. Feeling mentally jubilant, we shuffled the short distance to the Amtrak station down the hill and waited for our train to take us back to Jeff City and back to our lives.

A few people have asked since we returned how the trip was. In hindsight, it was incredible. We had so much fun and have a book full of funny quotes and moments from the journey. Would I do it again? Yes. But on a bike. I would love to bike a big portion of the Katy Trail, but I am confident that cross-country hiking is not my thing. This was a once-in-a-lifetime trip for many of us. I am so grateful for my fellow adventurers who embarked on this journey together. I am looking forward to many more adventures of slightly different varieties with them. Gandalf said, "I'm looking for someone to share in an adventure, and it's very difficult to find anyone." Well, we found a pretty great group of people to share our adventures with, and I'm pretty thankful for them.

1. Shelter-

   You can do all the prep work you want, but if a tornado rips through your house without a safe place to hide out, the last thought in your head as you go flying through the air will be “Man, I wasted a lot of time and money on canned corn.” The best shelter is underground surrounded by concrete with something overhead that won’t get ripped off. A tornado shelter that fits two people can cost around $3,000 dollars, but one big enough for ten is not worth the investment. It would be better to make sure someone spends a little extra money and build a concrete basement with a windowless room.
   

2. Generator and Gas- 

   The one predictable side effect of most natural disasters is knocking out the power grid in a city. The first thing that people do when the lights go out is run to a big box store and buy a worthless generator for three times the sticker price. The second thing they do is buy gas to run it – until there isn’t any gas left for the rest of the town. Buying a nice generator for a single house for everyone to stay in will save you a lot of money in a disaster, but a generator is useless without a gas supply to run it. Fifteen gallons will keep the generator running for about a week. It needs to be stored in a plastic container that is air tight and has a siphon/pump already attached. Gas will go bad after about six months, so it is important change it out with a fresh supply twice a year. You can use the leftover gas to power your car.
   

3. Medical Kit- 

   All the medical kit needs is gauss and bandages. If someone is hurt badly, the only thing you can do is to try to slow the bleeding, while you rush them to the hospital… if it is still standing. All the other typical junk in a medical kit is pretty much useless in an emergency. If you have a friend in the medical field, I recommend adding a couple of extra goodies that they can track down for you and demonstrate how to use:
   
   • Tourniquet- Should only be used for a maximum of 15 minutes or if a major artery is nicked
   • Decompression needle- Easy way to fix a collapsed lung
   • IV start kit with fluids- If you have lost a lot of blood, it is a good way to stabilize your blood pressure until you can get a transfusion

4. Water- 

   West Virginians are learning the hard way what happens when your city water supply goes sour. Most disasters will only leave you without water for a couple days, but a group of ten people drinking a couple liters a day adds up quickly, and you can only survive 3-4 days without water. Buying bottled water is not the way to go; it is expensive, goes bad faster and it takes up a lot of space. Buying a 35 gallon horizontal water tank is cheaper in the long run and you can refill anytime. Fill it up with tap water and add a couple drops of bleach to keep the bacteria at bay. After six months, the bacteria in the water will have multiplied to unsafe levels, so it will need to be changed. Just trust me on this one.
   

5. Miscellaneous doomsday goodies- 

   • Double bit axe- If something is in your way, this can help make it not be in your way anymore
   • Can opener- Jay has a lot of beer, and it would be a sad day if he had no way to enjoy it
   • Settlers of Catan and a deck of cards- You are going to need something to pass the time with all of your community members

February 15th marked the date of the first retreat that our little community has embarked upon under the banner "Spare Key". The retreats is a valuable instrument in every sojourner's tool bag. A brisk walk about your block can offer a view not afforded by a computer screen. A leisurely hike through wooded hills will clear the mind, open the lungs, and lend clarity to murky crossroads. We have, in the past, taken group retreats with an individual focus, each of us seeking guidance, order, or insight to shape our own personal goals. At a cabin outside of Eureka Springs, AR, we spent the day in silence spread about the property. In Mountain Grove, MO we had ample time to read and reflect between meals and group activities. This latest retreat, however, brought us together in communal reflection and discussion. Amber prepared for each of us a table to fill out on our own during our morning session. After a large breakfast together, we spent time alone at the Watershed Center on Valley Water Mill Lake north of Springfield. Some hiked, some ran, some laid out in hammocks crisscrossed between columns like the sleepiest of spiderwebs as we all worked quietly to evaluate and prioritize our personal benchmarks. When we gathered for lunch, each of us had completed a list of goals, short-term and long-term. In turn, we each presented our dreams and ambitions to the group, making notes on huge sticky pads and hanging our finished works on the wall. After each of us had a turn, we examined one-another's plans and made note of where one member could help another. We offered support in varied forms; lending time and tools, joining together in like missions, and extending words of encouragement and accountability. Upon the activity's conclusion, the community's vision and future took on finer detail, moving gently into focus from the amorphous blur and giving us confidence in our plans together. We have a great deal ahead of us, and we are not necessarily closer to any hard resolution, but we were certainly able to shed more light on each other's plans for the next few years. Mission accomplished.


Our next task was to construct the blog together. Bethany lead us through the website and we developed the content framework of our page. Schedules were made (I am only a week late in posting this!) and the bones of the blog gained some meat. There are many great things to come, so stay tuned.

There are few things that can bring a group together like laser tag. After putting the dogs to bed and changing into our most stealthy clothing, we pulled into the laser tag arcade and sat at a table together, decades older than most of the regulars. As we were called up to our first game, hearts raced with anticipation and boasts fell upon deaf ears; so full of ire and strategic plots, our minds were fully occupied. The vests were emblazoned with food names (Travis was Hot Dog, as could be expected) and lit up with a rainbow of colors. We played as individuals, chasing the lead, blasting bases, and trying to obey the rules like a child who is "not running" to get to the other side of the swimming pool. It seemed that just as we began ducking in and out of narrow fluorescent passages in this labyrinth that smelled of sweaty socks and bad smoke machines, we were called to the exit and given our score sheets. Hot Dog killed us. Not by a little, either. Like a real-life first-person-shooter computer foe, Travis expertly fired off twice as many shots as most of us and put his finely honed skills to use blowing us all away. The next game we decided to join forces. The Spare Key team of just six took on eight offenders in a red vs blue war of attrition. We were Spartans at Thermopylae, the last standing at the Alamo, David in the shadow of Goliath. We emerged victorious.

After a quick DQ and debrief, we headed our separate ways to rest after the day's lively activities. It is a joy to be linked to people like this, and I am certainly glad to spend the whole weekend walking, talking, and phaser-ing together.

-Rob Hunt